Happy 2017

The Christmas decor is all put away. Well, mostly. It's all packed up and as soon as the basement dries out from the backed up sewer incident, we will put it away.

Yeah. the year is off to a great start.

I have become something of a Grinch. The Holidays have really become something of a chore. They used to be so fun but not so much anymore. I miss Maggie. There is just a hole in the celebrations and in my heart. There are things about the Holidays that I really enjoy but I have to confess, I really love the day the decorations are all put away for another year and things return to "normal."

Grinchiness notwithstanding, the best part of the holidays is seeing family and friends. I wish we could extend the efforts we make at Christmastime to the rest of the year, and I am going to make that effort this year. I cannot see everyone I want to in the time between Thanksgiving and Christmas, so watch out, I may be coming to visit one random day in April.

Miss Emily and Maggie maybe 2005

We did have a special visitor this year. Emily came from Poland. Emily was Maggie's teacher way
back when. That was Emily's first job as a teacher. Can you imagine? Starting a career with my wise cracking severely disabled and medically fragile child in your class along with other equally involved kids. Emily did great and became a part of the family. She taught Maggie for two years until Maggie moved onto middle school and a couple of years after that, Emily took a job in an international school in Warsaw.

The last time Emily was here was Christmas 2013, just six weeks before Maggie left us.

Christmas 2013

When she heard about Maggie she wanted to fly here for the service, but I told her not to. The expense would be enormous and she did not need to do that to show us how much she loved Maggie and all of us. We already knew. When she arrived last Wednesday, it was the first time I have seen her since Maggie passed away. As she ran up to me at the airport, I though I was going to lose it.  We hugged for a long time.  There was so much in that hug. I felt like she was literally holding me together.

The visit was short, just two days, but I so appreciate her taking time from her actual family in San Diego to come up and see us. She brought her friend Hannah with her and we did a whirlwind ride around the City seeing the sites.

 Mostly, though we just talked and walked the dog and ate. At the very last minute I asked two other teachers from those days if they could come by and happily both Sheila and David could come. Sheila, aka "Evil Sheila" (her self given name) taught Maggie for four years before Emily arrived, and David was the speech therapist who was the first to have Maggie tell jokes to figure out how to communicate. Maggie absolutely found her power in joke telling. We sat around my dining room table drinking wine and eating pizza and reminiscing about those years.  I felt like Maggie was right there grinning at the end of the table.  It was excellent and it completed the Holidays.

Emily, Sheila, David and David's daughter Emily

 Emily left and the year ended quietly and we begin a new year.  Despite the sewer and other annoyances around the start of this year, 2017 hold a lot of promise. My son Eddie is getting married this year! Two nieces are also getting married! Another niece is having a baby! My mother is turning 90! There is happiness afoot, and I intend to be a part of it.

I read that many people adopt a word to frame the year in lieu of resolutions. I think that is an excellent idea, though I will do in in addition to the dozens of resolutions I have (most of which will be broken).

My word for this year is LISTEN. I learned in 2016 that I spend far too much time talking to people just like me and then I am surprised something from outside my orbit comes into the mainstream. It is time to get out of the echo chamber and actually LISTEN to what people have to say and try to see the world from other points of view.  That was automatic when I lived in Maggie's world, but with each passing day I get farther from that.

So talk to me, I will LISTEN.

Happy New Year.

Get yer International Woman right HERE

How handy that today is International Women's day and we have our very own International woman right here under our own roof. Our friend Emily has been staying with us this week. She lives in Warsaw Poland but she's in San Francisco for a seminar and she's staying with us.

Emily was Maggie's teacher in grades 3 through 5. That was her first job out of college. Starting your career with Maggie in your class! Yowsa! She left San Francisco for a job in the International school in Warsaw nearly 5 years ago. She's been back to visit San Francisco since then and usually stays with us. Maggie and Emily have a special bond.

Actually, all of us and Emily have a special bond.

What a week Ms Maggie has had. It started with Emily's arrival, included her birthday and Emily even did her nails.

 Maggie is glamorous and quite taken with herself. I'm not sure what next week holds, but it will be hard to top this one. That is for sure.

Last night the two of them were really causing trouble. Emily offered to do Maggie's "news" on her talker That was hilarious for a bunch of reasons. First of all Emily did a very long post, including phonetic spelling of some Polish words, and then accidentally cleared it before saving it. I videotaped her anguish which was hilarious.  I will just share a still because this is a family friendly blog! (but do surf my youtube channel) Suffice it to say it is beyond frustrating when that happens.

Emily figured at Maggie's age there should be some cuss words on the device. I said no because if they were on there, Maggie would press those buttons all day long. She figured if it was just in the news a bit that couldn't hurt. Maggie loved it. Here they are playing it back for the first time. 

How will I keep her down on the farm now?

Emily leaves tomorrow and it will be hard to see her go because it will probably be another year before we see her again. We can't wait until next International Women's Day.

The Divine Miss Em

Tuesday was a big day around here. Not only was it Maggie's first day back to school  for 2012, but some special visitors arrived. Maggie's former teacher Emily, who left San Francisco to teach in an international school in Warsaw Poland, came to stay with us for a few days with her handsome Polish boyfriend Dominik. Dominik has never been to San Francisco, so he got to see the sights and we got to visit with Emily.

Other than the occasional skype call, we have not seen Emily in nearly four years. I wondered if Maggie would really remember. She did, without question. As soon as she heard Emily's voice, Maggie started pumping her arm in excitement.

Emily taught Maggie for two years, in 4th and 5th grade.That was her first job out of college. She was hired a week before summer school started, packed her bags in San Diego and headed to San Francisco not knowing a soul or having anyplace to live. She acclimated to San Francisco perfectly and stayed at least five years. Emily connected with the families of several of her students, but of course I assume we were the closest. (Probably everyone else thinks that too.) She was over here many times over the years and was like a part of the family.

Perhaps because of her youth and freshness as a teacher, or more likely because of the person she is, Emily was the MOST enthusiastic teacher you can imagine. Together with Sheila, who taught Maggie and her classmates from K-2, she had to most disabled children in her class and made sure every one of them was engaged in whatever was going on. The two of them made sure the kids were included in the larger school activities. Not "included" in a special ed way, but truly a part of every activity. For example, there was a school talent show and Emily played straight man and facilitator to Maggie's "sit down" comedy role. (Maggie repeated that gig in middle school with "Teacher Joe" playing the straight man.)

Maggie was of course the perfect student for Emily because she is also very enthusiastic. In those days, before she had the trach, Maggie used to shout with excitement all the time. There was a lot of shouting during her time with Emily. Maggie was a Diva from the beginning, and Emily encouraged that at a time in Maggie's life that really made it stick. Maggie went off to middle school confident and sassy and never wavered from that personality.

Given Emily's sense of adventure, it was no real surprise when she decided to take her show on the road. She moved to Warsaw not knowing a soul and without a place to live, just as she did when she moved here. Of course she loves it there, but Emily loves wherever she is.  Even hanging out in the basement waiting for the school bus yesterday or checking out Maggie modeling her Euro Cup shirt that Emily brought her from Poland. (below)

Now we have to say goodbye again because Emily and Dominik return to Warsaw today. It won't be sad, though because we know she will be back

               

Chistmas all year long!

I dismantled Christmas. It took a few days and some negotiation, but it's 99% done now. The negotiation stem from my husband's insistence that things should stay up until January 6th, the Feast of the Magi. As you know, I vote for taking it down December 26th at 12:01AM but, to avoid being called Grinch or Scrooge,  I don't really start barking until New Years.

We had a dinner guest on the 3rd so I agreed to leave the tree up if we could take down all the other paraphernalia/decorations.  Now the tree is gone too. The platform the tree was on is still in the living room, but that's going today. The Nativity scene can stay up until tomorrow so the Three Kings know we were expecting them. (I'm hoping for myrrh, but frankincense is always nice too.)

Even though the decorations are gone, the gifts just keep on coming! Yesterday we received a wonderful package of things from Vanya, one of our German exchange students. It is easier to imagine her at home with the book of pictures from her region of Germany. It looks incredibly beautiful. That was fun and Maggie loved her new scarf, which is a bit more stylish than her usual kerchief.

Later in the evening, we received another set of gifts from Emily, Maggie's former teacher who is visiting from Poland. Maggie looks cool in her new shirt for the Euro Cup (which will take place in Warsaw this summer) and I have a lovely porcelain bell.

Steve's present was the best, however. Everyone is familiar with the Russian Nesting dolls - those lovely wooden dolls that have smaller and smaller ones inside. Little did we know, however, that the Russians were such 49er fans. It cracks me up that these dolls were inspired by the San Francisco 49ers, made in Russia, purchased in Poland and traveled back overseas to San Francisco.

These will be displayed through the Superbowl. No negotiation needed. We just have to hope the real 49ers  are still in the hunt.

'scuse me. I have a platform to move.