Christmas in April

Ok, I know it's only March. But the title works better with April.

This morning I awoke to the sound of a truck idling outside. Oh good. It's 6:30 AM Monday and the contractors are back at work next door. The hammers start flying at 7, but today we had a nice early arrival of some sort of large truck. Excellent.

I understand the need to get to work early, and I have to admit I am impressed with the work ethic of the crew. There is not a moment wasted, those guys are hard at work form 7:00AM to 5:00PM. But this is week number eight - of about 24 -  and it is getting tiresome, to say the least.

Things are going as well as can be expected with such proximity and bother. There was the incident I wrote about before when the bracing was in my yard blocking Maggie's wheelchair access. The boys hopped to and fixed it straight away. Last week someone tipped over the portable toilet and I called the owner of the house to let him know. In fairness, that was probaby some high school kids  Then the other morning,  I got Maggie downstairs, and opened the garage door just in time to see the bus pull away. Seems the big boss told the bus to move so he could hitch up his trailer full of crap and take it away. That required him to block my driveway for several minutes delaying the bus access for several minutes while he worked on the trailer. That was REALLY not cool.

I didn't say anything at the time because I was so mad I was fuming. I know that it is best that I keep my mouth shut when I'm that angry because there is just no telling what will come out. Steve made the mistake of making light of it when I came back into the house and I nearly tore his head off. (It's a dangerous job being married to me.) I said/screeched, THEY DO NOT GET TO MESS WITH MAGGIE. (and I may have used a different word than "mess".) Steve quickly understood that I was NOT pleased. The next day I mentioned to the foreman that was unacceptable and that I instructed the bus driver to ignore them from now on. He got it right away. I think he was very sad to see that garage door open before he finished and knew he was caught red handed. I told him they can do their job, but they cannot interfere with my life - except for constant noise for six months. Even a day later, my tone was clipped.

I believe we have an understanding now.

It is difficult because this is a row house. They have a lot that is 25 feet wide and it abuts my lot that is 25 feet wide. To give you an example, this is what I saw while I ate breakfast the other day. It is a workman redoing the window in my neighbors dining room, and it is taken from my dining room table.

Today has been particularly loud and shaky. A picture frame on my bookshelf fell over a couple of times. Finally I just laid it down and will put it back up when they move away from that corner of the house.

I am glad Maggie is at school all day - but next week is Spring Break so I'm not sure what we will do then. Lots of outings, I guess.

Oh and just to complete this Monday morning I have to share another ridiculous fashion choice by the nurse.  First of all, the nurse I have on Sunday night does everything in the morning, which is very helpful. Maggie is in her chair with all the equipment attached which saves me at least 15 minutes in the morning. It's good thing though, because I often have to change Maggie's clothes when this particular nurse is here. There have been some very odd outfit combinations.

This morning Maggie looked fine, though I was a bit perplexed at the 4th of July shirt. Didn't matter, Maggie is a proud American and she can show it all year long. I left it. It wasn't until I was getting ready to head downstairs that I noticed the socks.

Sure,  St. Patrick's day is over, so lets' get out the fuzzy Christmas socks with the snowflakes.

We changed those while we waited for the bus to arrive.  The workmen watched and wondered, but they seemed to be staying on their side of the hedge.

They don't want to cross me again so soon.

Now THAT'S a Glamour DON'T

Many years ago I worked with my friend Anna at a law firm. If someone made a fashion faux pas Anna would say under her breath, "Now THAT"S a Glamour Don't!" I would laugh every time. I hadn't thought about that term for a very long time. This may be difficult for some of you to believe, but I am not a regular reader of Glamour Magazine. I don't know if they still have the "Glamour Dont's" section, but boy oh boy, I know one when I see it.

Generally I am a morning person. I get right up and hit the day head on. This does not apply on the morning after daylight savings time starts. As soon as I woke up this morning I joined people all over America (except Arizona) in group denial about the time and grumbled about how dark it was. I thought I had accidentally set the clocks back two hours. Nope. It was really time to get up.

I stumbled downstairs trying to wake up all the way. As soon as I greeted Maggie the sleepiness disappeared. I have seen some strange clothing choices on Maggie and I almost always keep my mouth shut. Not today.

Maggie was already in her chair almost ready to go down to meet the bus. The nurse we have on Sunday night does 90% of the morning madness for me, which is great. Today I had to redo a lot of it.  Maggie was sitting in her chair in THIS jacket and pants combo. Yes, wild geometric black and white print pants with a leopard print jacket and a flag print bandana!


Here's a close up of the bandana in case you can't see it.

I quickly had to assess the rest of the outfit. Maybe I should just not say anything. I wondered what could possibly be under the jacket. I unzipped it a bit and saw a bright floral print shirt. 

Four articles of clothing, four completely and wildly different prints in every conceivable color. I could not ignore or let Maggie go out of the house like this. She looked ridiculous No. this was not going to happen. I don't care HOW dark it is.

When I am dressing Maggie I generally give her a couple of items from which to choose so that she has some control over what she wears. Of course I first make certain that all of the choices work together because people are already staring at Maggie and she doesn't need any additional fodder for the staring. 

I told the nurse this was not OK and that Maggie needs to look at least somewhat "put together" when she leaves. She offered to change her but I said I would do it. As soon as she left I asked Maggie if she wanted to wear things that matched and she pulled her shirt up as if to say, Get this off of me!

We switched the shirt for a solid gray and put on her gray jacket and she was ready to go. I failed to get a picture of the bandana du jour but we went with a lovely green number to offset the look.

It took so much time to change, though. that I didn't have time to dress myself. I met the bus in my bathrobe and clogs. That too is a "glamour don't," but fortunately for me, Maggie can't work the camera on my phone. 

 



   

Par-Tay

Maggie’s birthday is next Wednesday. Because I am having surgery Tuesday we will be in no shape for a proper celebration on the big day; hence we are having a party tomorrow in school.


I have to get he Maggie Mix 2010 cd prepared. Thanks to my niece Nina and from some of you (especially Elizabeth M) I have the songs, I just need to burn the cd’s. So the music will be set. You might be wondering what sort of themes we are having. Maggie and her teacher picked that out and I have to commend them on their very original choice.

Pirates? no! Surfing? No. Disco? no.

Maggie is having a pineapple party.

Yes, that’s right, pineapple.

Ms. Taylor(Maggies teacher) talked with Maggie about what she would like and this was the result. Why? you may ask. All I can say is why not? Maggie loves pineapple. She likes the sound of the word and she likes the texture and even the taste.

Even though she gets 100% of her nutrition from her gastrostomy tube,(“g-tube”) Maggie does get to taste certain things. The choices are very limited because of her severe allergies to so many things and her aversion to certain textures in her mouth. For some reason pineapple passes both tests. Pineapple is something she loves. Therefore, a pineapple party it is.

Maggie and I went to the party store over the weekend. I was thinking I would have to find Hawaiian or Tiki decorations and try to find pineapples that way. Au contraire. We found pineapple lights and many pineapple decorations and we bought ‘em all. Today I am going to make a pineapple upside down cake, buy some pineapple spears and order Hawaiian pizza for the party.

Other than her classmates and others from Mission High, just my mom is coming along with Steve and me. When I called to invite my mother, I told her about the theme and she said. “Perfect, I’ll wear m pineapple jacket.”

Of course she has a pineapple jacket. What 82-year-old mother of seven, grandmother of 20 and great grandmother of three doesn’t.

Maybe that’s where Maggie gets her joie de vivre.

Sweet Sixteen

Maggie’s 16th birthday is on March 3. 16! That is hard for me to believe.


Birthdays for her are funny. They make me very happy and very sad. It makes me happy because we made it through another year. There were many years that I did not think she would survive. Today, though it is a lot of work to keep her this way, she is healthy and stable. It makes me sad because birthdays are a reminder of the day she was born and all the terror that came with it and the very very long road we have been on ever since.

The road one has to travel with a disabled child is different from the road with typical kids. They overlap or intersect at times, but generally it is a different path altogether.  This road is filled with amazing and lovely things that others never get to see, but it is full of rocks and potholes too. That’s ok; it’s just the way it is.

Birthdays are one of the places the two roads intersect. Everybody can relate to birthdays, but for parents like me, birthdays become a very public reminder of what will never be. She is 16. That is a milestone birthday. Kids have sweet 16 parties and get drivers licenses. Not Maggie.

And that’s ok because it’s just the way it is.

When Maggie was little the boys used to ask questions about what she would and would not be able to do when she got bigger. We just answered the questions as they arose. Not because we are such excellent parents with a developmental plan, but Rather, we did not really look forward very often and the questions from the boys allowed us to deal with the future from their perspective. I specifically recall Eddie’s concern that Maggie would never have to do chores. He offered to customize her wheelchair by attaching a broom to the bottom so she could sweep the floor

Once when Maggie was about two I stopped at a store on the way home. She was still in a car seat then. Generally, I would jump out of the car, get the stroller/wheelchair set up and then grab Maggie. For some reason that day, I grabbed Maggie first. Doing anything with her in my arms was impossible. She could not even hold her head up and it took both arms to secure her safely in your arms. I had Maggie in my arms and needed to put her down to open her stroller/wheelchair. I propped her up in the driver’s seat with one hand on her and the other hand opening the chair. As I fumbled with the equipment one handed, Tim, who was about 6 or 7 looked at Maggie in the driver’s seat and asked, “Mom, will Maggie ever be able to drive?”

Of course I knew the answer was no, but that was a loaded question. It was so far away and simply telling him so could be devastating. We tended to take things as they came and this was looking way way down the line. I looked at her in the driver’s seat and looked at him and, buying time, I said, well she is awfully short, don’t you think? He laughed and said, NO, I mean when she’s bigger

I just faced the music and said, “I don’t think so Tim.” He said why not?” as if it were a challenge to me. The boys knew Maggie was going to therapists and doctors several times a week and we were all waiting to see how far she would go. By that point, I was hoping she would someday be able to sit up on her own (did not happen) but the boys were still thinking she was going to be fine. Going for the easiest answer I said, well, she doesn’t see very well and California really does not want people driving vehicles if they cannot see where they are going. “He nodded and said, “Oh, right” That totally satisfied him, but I think he had a greater understanding after that. They have always been close and that day made them a little closer. I may have posted this picture of the two of them before, but here it is again. It is one of my favorites. He's watching tv and holding her as she sleeps.

Now Maggie is there. Maggie is of “driving” age. We are all the way down that road, she is who she is, and the boys are who they are. That’s just the way it is.

 And it’s all good.

Celebrate in triplicate

Maggie’s birthday is in a couple of weeks. Birthdays are often difficult for parents of disabled children because it is like a flashing billboard reminding us of how different our kids are from their non-disabled peers. That is not so much the case with me anymore, but it was for several years. I still dislike her birthday time, for other reasons. In Maggie’s world birthdays mean more than gifts and celebrations, it is time to check in with all the service providers to renew, update tweak or even discontinue services. And Happy Birthday to you too.


This started yesterday with our visit to the doctor at California Children’s Services (CCS). This one is actually semiannual. The physical and occupational therapists give their report on Maggie’s progress toward her goals, set new goals for the next six months and recommend the frequency of service. The PT recommended cutting her therapy in half. I think that is a crock, but I did not fight it. The budget is in tatters in California and I am not sure what benefit she would get from someone who does not want to work with her.

I can accept the fiscal realities. Everybody is feeling the pinch, and Maggie is no different. What I will NOT stand for, however, is having reports contain inappropriate or incorrect information to justify cutting services. Maggie’s web of services is so complicated that a wrong piece of information at point A can be plugged in at point B and screw up more pressing services. The PT gave me his draft report and I had him change it to be accurate. If he can justify cutting services with correct information, I would not fight him. I do not agree with it, but I have to choose my battles.

Monday is Maggie’s IEP, (Individual Education Program) meeting. This is the school district’s mandated annual meeting to address Maggie’s educational needs and what services the school district will offer to meet those. For some parents this is a very contentious meeting. That has never been my experience and I do not expect it will be this time either. There may be some cuts here and there because the San Francisco Schools are B R O K E, but I am more interested in the program as a whole. There are no transitions this year, so I expect it will be fine.

After the school district, I have to meet with Golden Gate Regional Center (GGRC) for Maggie’s annual review there. I cannot remember the name of that document IPP – Individual program plan, I think. This addresses Maggie’s needs that are not school or therapy related. This agency has been reimbursing me for the nursing for the past couple of years. I do not anticipate any changes there either, but I do not think I will rest easy until I know that is the case. The budget crises looms large, but California is going to have to pay for Maggie one way or the other. It is cheaper and better for the state (and for Maggie) to stay at home than to live in an institution, so I doubt her care will be affected.

Because Maggie’s disabilities are so extreme, I do not have the same angst over these meetings that other parents have. Maggie’s needs are obvious and the services are in place. I do have to be vigilant that the reports are correct, though because undoing a mistake is very difficult. Agency B will rely upon incorrect or understated information about her medical needs from Agency A and the services adjusted accordingly. If it results in being offered a service we do not need, that’s easy; but more often it puts me in a position to fight to keep something she DOES need.

As you can imagine, all of this really kills the mood to celebrate her birthday. The real celebration comes when all this is complete.

This year, just for good measure, I am having my shoulder surgery the day before her birthday. I should be a barrel of laughs for Maggie.

Feliz Cumpleanos

There was a party on Friday afternoon in Maggie’s classroom and I was invited. It was Juan’s 18th birthday. Juan is Maggie’s “boyfriend.” He has significant disabilities himself, but he uses what he has to his advantage. He is the only one in the class who can walk, so he is able to position himself next to Maggie all the time.

Juan is unable to speak and uses a dynavox as well. He does not need the buttons like Maggie does, but just uses the communication device directly. When Maggie wants to talk, she hits one switch to move the “cursor” to the thing she wants to say and, once there, uses the other switch to actually say it. When Maggie gets going, she can fly through the screens and selections to say exactly what she wants. When she is not in the mood, she just sits there smiling as if to say, “You know what I want, just do it.” Juan will have none of that. He takes her hand and hits the button with it as if to say, “C’mon, get with it.” Maggie responds to him.

Maggie did not need any prompting on Friday, though. I programmed her talker so that she could say "Happy Birthday Juan" in spanish, which is the language Juan's family speaks at home. It's simply Feliz Cumpleanos. However, that took a while becaue the dynavox doesn't recognize spanish words and I had to spell them phonetically. I believe I entered it "Felleez coompleeaanyos." He loved the message and so did his mom. (Maggie's making points with the mother.)

There are six kids in Maggie’s class and I assumed the party would be those students, the adults in the class and a couple of parents. I arranged my day to get to Juan’s party at 1:00PM, just as it was beginning. Or so I thought. When I arrived at 1:05, there were at least 25 people in the room. Juan made invitations on the computer in the classroom the day before and went all over the school distributing them. Even the principal stopped by. It was a happy group of people.

Juan was decked out in a suit and tie, and he looked marvelous. He greeted each person, including me, with a big hug. When the noise became too much for him he put on his headphones for a few minutes until he was ready to deal with it again. He is a man who knows how to handle himself.

I did get one picture of Maggie and Juan with my phone. However, I missed the best part. I received an important call and stepped out of the room for a minute. While I was gone, Juan was dancing with Maggie, holding her hand and twirling her around in the wheelchair. The teacher and nurse were looking for me, but I was in the hallway. Of course, it happens the minute I step out.


Then again, maybe it is no coincidence. Juan saw the old lady was gone and made his move.


Gratitude: I am thankful Maggie has such wonderful people around her. In all honestly, I am also thankful Maggie is not 18 yet.

Young Lady, you are NOT wearing that

I have described the hectic nature of the mornings around here. I am so lucky to have the nurse here to get Maggie dressed and ready. I don’t lay out Maggie’s clothes, because I don’t really care what she wears, as long as she looks clean and neat. It may be time to switch that and decide myself what clothes she will wear. I am aware that it is important that she looks good and decently put together. People are already staring, so a touch of class is important. I did have to balk this morning when I saw Maggie sitting in her chair in THIS.

If you can’t see well, try to picture some green pants with small shamrocks all over them – Target specials for St. Patrick’s day (which was three months ago) paired with a pink and yellow paisley shirt that looks like it was designed by peter max. Ay yi yi. She was already in the chair when I caught the ensemble, I realized she was wearing that shirt, but she wasn’t all the way dressed when I said good morning. It was too involved to change her pants, I would have to unstrap her and lift her out of the chair and onto the bed and then reverse the whole thing. Instead I just left her in the chair and changed her shirt. Still not quite “classy” but at least a step in the right direction.

In another mismatched outfit – but this at the end of the day getting ready for bed Maggie sat with Tim in the big chair. He put his Irish hat on her and she loved it. I just had to add these. She stayed cool for about a minute than just cracked up.

Happy Birthday Maggie

Today is Maggie actual birthday. She was born 15 years ago, on March 3, 1994. That was a hard day in my life. I've written the whole story, but it's too much to think about now.

Yesterday was frustrating. Maggie stayed home from school because she is still ill. It was special olympics day, so I took her there myself. I figured she could do that much and then come home. She was dressed and ready to go in her new basketball socks. We arrived at the gym and there was no way to get close in a car. It's very pretty, set way back in a grove of trees. It looked very far away in the downpour. The kids had to walk through the rain about 50 yards to the gym. The path was full of puddles; I could see some of the kids feet were completely submerged. That was daunting.Pushing a wheelchair through standing water is very difficult.

It was also on a fairly busy narrow street and there was no where to unload the wheelchair. I called the nurse on the cell because the class was already inside. I explained my dilemma. She said they had a hard time getting the other kids in because the path was also very steep. I asked where the bus unloaded and she said they just blocked traffic for about ten minutes. It's one thing for a school bus to do that and quite another for a personal vehicle. Besides, I couldn't just leave Maggie out there while I parked the car. The closest spot was about three blocks away.

The nurse offered to come and help me, but I said, I think we have to skip this. It was POURING rain, Maggie was sick, her eye was still swollen shut, and the access was just ridiculous. Somebody was a little unclear on the concept. Special olympics should not have access issues.(No one's fault it was raining, but it's the first week of March and that's entirely likely).

Maggie was NOT happy with me, but sometimes mean moms have to make the tough calls.

I needed some Irish tea so we went to buy that. We parked inside and she never got wet. The store was a bit difficult to maneuver in the wheelchair, but we managed. She was wiped out when we got home.

In fact, she's home today as well. We're going to go say hello at school if this downpour stops. She's sick, but she has stretches where she's doing well. And it's her birthday, so we can't just hang out. I suggested a bowl of ice cream with a candle for tonight, since we had a big cake on Sunday. Remember, Maggie doesn't eat cake or ice cream. Actually I don't really eat cake either. But Steve does. And he thought that was a dumb idea. So we'll make another cake today. That will be fun for Maggie anyway.

My girl is fifteen. Amazing. Though remembering the day she was born is difficult, every day since has been a miracle. I never in a million years thought she'd be here on her 15th birthday. She's here and thriving. (Present illness notwthstanding).

One Eyed Jump Shot

It has been an interesting weekend. Maggie’s birthday party was yesterday. It is the first time in years that we actually had a party. Birthdays can be tough and the celebratory feel just is not always there.

This year, Maggie discovered music and made some good friends at school. That made it easier. We had a dance party. I sought input on the music from the girls, from my niece Nina, downloaded it, and had it playing the whole time. For the Piece de resistance, Maggie received a disco ball as an early birthday present from my friend Linny. Dad rigged it up with a motor and lights.

There wasn’t a lot of dancing, but with four wheelchairs in the house, there wasn’t a lot of room anyway. With the teachers and attendants et al, there were over 20 people. It was crowded and fun.

Maggie had fun; but she would have enjoyed it more if she felt better. Friday evening she had an “episode”. She turned blue and was really having trouble breathing. It was about 6PM, just as the doctor’s are gone for the weekend. Perfect. We know what to do; we gave her oxygen, changed the trach, and got her back and stable. It took several minutes, though and the trach change did not really help. This was a different problem. I considered the ER, but Friday night in the ER is craziness. We watched her closely and though she needed more oxygen than usual, she was doing all right. When she still needed oxygen in the morning, I knew we had to go. I presumed she had pneumonia. The docs decided the same thing, even thought her x-ray was clear. She started the med, had a good day and Saturday we were a “go” for the party. Saturday night was a little dicey, but that’s par for the course.

Sunday morning as I was leaving to pick up the cake, the doctor called from the ER to tell me that Maggie has RSV, respiratory syncytial virus. For normal healthy people at is a bad cold, for babies, or children with trachs (like Maggie) it can be much worse. In addition, it is highly contagious. Arrgh. I called as many people as I could. One decided not to come and one decided not to bring her little kids. Other than that, everybody came to the party. It is pretty easy to stay away from Maggie because the wheelchair is a natural barrier. I hope that the guests left only with their treats and not with any bugs.

The capper was about an hour before the party when Maggie started reacting to something. Her left eye just swelled up and closed. We gave her Benadryl right away, but she has looked like this for the past 24 hours.

Could be the prescription, could be just the illness itself. Nevertheless, she went through her party as Popeye. Today we are waiting to hear from the doctor. She is not going to school this morning, but I am going to take her over to Special Olympics. She has been practicing so hard for this.

Of course, it’s basketball, so I am not sure how accurate her shot will be with one eye closed.

Pipe Down

Maggie’s class is very small. There are only four full time students assigned to the class. Other kids come in for part of the day, but generally, it is intimate. Lately it has been only three kids as one is still recovering from surgery. She will be back next week, though. Until then it is just Maggie and the boys, “Y’ and “G.” All four of the kids are in wheelchairs so there is a lot of equipment in the room. In addition, the class focuses on augmentative communication and all the full time students are non-verbal. Maggie has additional medical challenges that the other kids do not have to deal with, but she has an advantage over the two boys in a different way. She comes from a family where English is the first language.

Imagine if you can, a child trying to overcome his physical handicaps and inability to speak by using augmentative communication – and having that “augmentative communication” taught in a language you do not hear at home. It is very difficult. “Y” is Chinese and his family does not speak English at all. “G”’s family is Spanish speaking. They are able to speak English, but do not do so at home. That puts them at a tremendous disadvantage trying to learn a communication device that is speaking a different language.

It is particularly difficult for “Y” who only recently joined the class. He is still getting familiar with the concept of being able to communicate. It is frustrating for him; and when he’s frustrated, he tends to scream. Then when he gets the feedback for screaming, he screams again. It can be trying for everyone.

The other day Maggie and I were in the kitchen and she was jabbering away on her communication device. It is normal enough for us that I was only half paying attention to her. I was just responding to what I heard without really listening. (Oh, come on now, other mothers do the same thing). I realized after a bit I didn’t know what she was saying. When I finally stopped to really listen I heard something that sounded like “Moo CHO.” I went over to her talker to see which button she was hitting, but she had moved off that page. I asked her to go back and press the “Moo CHO” button again. She started navigating back to that page.

I figured it was either a mistake or she was saying “mucho” in Spanish. Keep in mind, the communication device speaks phonetically and it could have just been reading it wrong. Often when I am programming it, I have to misspell words so that they will be pronounced correctly. (For instance: “let’s read a book” comes out "let’s red a book" so I spell it “reed”)

She found the button and hit it again. Apparently, Maggie also speaks Cantonese. Moo CHO means stop screaming. The whole read out is “Stop screaming. Moo CHO.” I was very impressed. I asked Maggie is she says that to “Y” and she said yes. I asked does he still scream a lot and she just hit “Moo CHO” and started laughing.

Pretty cool. I've always said Maggie was the one child who cannot talk, but can still "talk back," Now I have to add that she cannot speak, but can bark orders in several languages.

She gets that from me.

Also, Maggie received a new jean jacket from her Aunt Dianne yesterday. It just arrived in the mail for no particular reason. We’ll call it an early birthday present. She looked pretty cool heading off to school this morning.

Party plans

Maggie's birthday is approaching. She will be 15 on March 3.

Many parents of disabled children will tell you that the birthday is hard. I am one of them.They are a reminder of many things. The day she was born was not a happy day. And milestones marking that day are likewise not happy.

It was more difficult when she was younger because parents use birthdays as developmental milestones as well. "He was walking before his first birthday" "She was speaking in full sentences by 2" "He could read before 5,"etc etc. When your child isn't hitting any of those milestones, reminders are hard.

By age 15 those measurements are long behind us. In fact there are some blessings to Maggie not being a typical teenager. I NEVER get attitude. Maggie has two speeds - happy and quiet. She's not moody or sad. If something hurts she cries and she occasionally gets mad, but generally it's either because she's tired or frustrated because she cannot make her wants understood. There's no drama - well at least not teenage drama. (WE do have a lot of medical drama).

This year we are going to party. We considered various options for her birthday. Bowling is fun, but the only place with the adapted bowling doesn't have parking and it's a hassle to get to. So that's out. Other options were likewise unworkable. We decided to go with the basic, party at the house. We have a lift so the wheelchairs can get in easily. It will be a dancing and pizza party. Maggie's friends from school can come over and we'll have dance music for them. (I am consulting with my 13 year old niece for the right mix of music) I can burn cd's for the kids as party favors. Steve can make his pizza dough and the kids can make their own pizzas. There could be as many as five wheelchairs in here, so we will have to move the furniture, but we should do that anyway for a dance party, right?

It will actually be a developmentally appropriate party - 13-15 year olds eating pizza and listening to music.

Hmmmm. Everything evens out eventually.

Musical suggestions welcome.