Danger Will Robinson!

Every morning we wait for the bus in front of the house. In San Francisco, most kids do not get transportation to school. I believe it is just special ed and a few others. Maggie, the most special of special ed students, gets door-to-door bus service. It’s great. We just head downstairs with her wheelchair loaded with the supplies and wait in the driveway. The school has a nurse accompany Maggie on the bus and in school. That nurse is either waiting for us when the garage door opens or comes walking down the street a minute or two later.

The bus driver changes all the time. The bus company is separate from the school district. The routes are determined through a complicated bidding system based on seniority and other union based criteria. The morning route is different from the afternoon route; hence, the driver is different. There are not THAT many drivers on the wheelchair buses; but after nine years in the school district, we are still meeting new drivers all the time. I learn their names and how much interaction they want. Every driver is different. Some welcome my efforts to help and others do not want it. Therefore, before jumping in I just ask each new driver: “Should I close the door after the lift goes up.” Some say yes; others do not want me to touch anything. It’s cool. Whatever.

So far this year our morning driver is a guy named Dave. Davie is animated and talkative and the kids love him. According to the nurse, he even enlists the aid of the kids on the bus to figure out which is the best route to take each morning to beat the traffic and arrive at school on time. Maggie doesn’t take part in that conversation because she cannot have her communication device attached during the bus ride. Still, she enjoys the repartee.

Maggie’s favorite thing is Dave’s arrival in the morning. He says the same thing every day. When the wheelchair lift is lowering, Dave says loudly, “Warning! Warning! Danger! Danger!” quoting the robot from the old “Lost in Space” TV show. He does this to make sure none of us is clunked in the head by the lift coming down. It took me a week or so to notice this, but Maggie waits for it and laughs her head off when he says it. When he actually throws in “Danger Will Robinson” as the lift goes back up, Maggie goes crazy.

Dave was the last one to know how much Maggie enjoyed this. She is loaded onto the lift facing out; the driver is behind her so he cannot see her face. In addition, Maggie does not make any sound because of the trach. If you cannot see her, you don’t know she’s laughing. Now that Dave realizes she is reacting so positively, he has kicked it into high gear.

Yesterday Dave’s bus broke down and they sent a replacement. It just was not the same. Maggie looked somewhat glum as the lift was going up and the driver was not yelling about DANGER! Just a boring school day. I guess you could say Maggie lives for “DANGER!”

This morning as Dave arrived both the nurse and I could see her body anticipating Dave’s warning. She was not disappointed. It was louder than ever and I thought she was going to stop breathing she was laughing so hard. It is a little disconcerting for pedestrians walking by though. They see a little girl on a wheelchair lift and someone yelling DANGER! And everybody is laughing. We look like a bunch of sadistic nuts. One of these days, Child Protective Services will be knocking on my door.