Tuesday, May 18, 2010
I heard the nurse calling me but it took me a few minutes to realize it was real and not part of my dream. I hopped out of bed and headed for the stairs. After a couple of steps, I turned around to pick up my glasses. At that point, I was not sure what the problem was, but whatever it was, I was going to have to be able to see. Trying to focus my eyes at 4AM is difficult, especially considering I cannot see much without glasses even when wide awake.
Happily, when I arrived at her bed, Maggie was not in any distress. The nurse was standing at her side when it broke and kept it in place until I came down. We have an emergency kit and making the change is quick. I was back in bed in 15 minutes, but never really went back to sleep. Even though I knew Maggie was fine, it is difficult to settle back down once the adrenaline is pumping, and being roused out of a dead sleep to deal with a broken trach definitely gets the adrenaline pumping.
I just stayed in bed watching the clock and thinking about all the balls we have in the air. Some are just the everyday worries but others are more significant. For example, there is still no word on when they will do Maggie’s surgery. I talked to two of the three specialists involved and have an appointment with the surgeon next Wednesday. Originally I was worried that Maggie would miss her prom, but the prom is on Friday so that, obviously, is not an issue. Given the lack of urgency from the specialists, I am now going to push to wait another couple of weeks until school is out. Many kids yearn for summer vacation, but that is not a great time for Maggie. She LOVES going to school; it is really her entire social life. There is one week between the end of the academic school year and the beginning of summer school. Maggie will likely be out of commission more than one week, but it might as well encompass that week off.
The alarm rang at 6:30 and I got up and started the wild routine to get Maggie onto the bus. Since she left I have been "vegging out" in the front room. I am tired and worn out, but not sleepy, probably because of the three strong cups of coffee. But that will wear off so it is time for me to hop into the shower and carpe diem.
I have to hurry so I can still get in that nap this afternoon.