Special Olympics

The Special Olympics World Games are happening right now in Los Angeles. (check it out here http://www.la2015.org/) I am seeing so many articles and heart warming stories. They make me happy and of course they make me sad, too.

Maggie participated in Special Olympics through the San Francisco Unified School district. There were a few events every year, but the big spring time track and field event was the best. All of the participating athletes from all over the city would gather at Kezar Stadium and have a day of great events.

Maggie was definitely into it. She would get her "game face" on and have the time of her life.

She also had fun just hanging with her fans, including me and Grandma. 

(Different year, no eye black)

Generally these performances were not on the level of the athletes now participating at the World games, but I bet the SF kids had even more fun. I thank Special Olympics and the San Francisco Unified School District for partnering together to give Maggie and her peers such great days. And for giving me such great memories.

Special Olympics is worthy of your support, financial and otherwise.  If you ever want to feel uplifted, spend a day at a local Special Olympics event or the world games if you are in LA. You will see sport at its most pure and nothing but delight everywhere you turn.

Mothers Day

It's Mother's Day. Everybody knows it's Mother's Day because television and internet ads, store displays, facebook posts, and even blog entries bombard you with this information for days and weeks. This year I find all those reminders a bit painful.

I have a wonderful mother who is going strong as she approaches her 87th birthday - and I know how very lucky that makes me. I am a mother. I have two sons who have grown into fine young men who will call me or come by to check in on Mother's Day, just as they do many other days. That too makes me lucky.

Yet I feel lost on this mother's day because I lost the person who most defined me as a mother. Being Maggie's mother was an experience all it's own and I am lost without having it as part of my daily life.

Before you say anything, let me assure you, I know that I will always be her mother. I know that I was a good mother to her. I know we had an incredible bond that surpassed even that of mother-daughter.  I know I was lucky to have her and that luck lasted far longer than anyone might have predicted.  But I miss her and I miss the person I was when she was here with me. Maggie made me a better person and she made me a better mother.

I still do things to honor and remember her and probably will forever. Yesterday I stopped by Special Olympics at Kezar stadium to cheer on Maggie's peers. It made me both happy and sad. As I wandered through the crowd I heard a young girl say, "Hey, Your MAGGIE'S mom!" I smiled as I recognized her friend from middle school days who was there to compete. I hadn't seen her in probably five years, but she still knew I was "Maggie's mom." That made me happy.

A few minutes later I became a little uncomfortable when she asked, "Where's Maggie?" I froze for a minute before answering, "She's not here." (Pause) "I don't think her class arrived yet."  Both statements were technically true, but taken together were very misleading. There was just no way I was going to tell that child what had happened. She was there to compete in Special Olympics, she was having fun. Nothing would be gained from telling her.

I left shortly after that exchange. As I walked home through a sparkling Golden Gate Park I wondered if I had done the right thing. And, if I did, was I protecting her or me? It doesn't matter, I suppose. We could both use a little protecting. That's what mother's do, right? They protect. I smiled again as I thought of her greeting and of my nearly twenty years as "Maggie's Mom."

 I was MAGGIE'S mom!
 I was Maggie's MOM!
I was MAGGIE'S MOM!

It was the hardest and best job I ever had. And it was a wild wild ride, that's for sure.

Happy Mother's Day.  Enjoy the ride.

Special Olympics pictures

Special Olympics was last Friday. I promised more pictures and haven't had two minutes to post them. Finally, here they are.

This particular Special Olympics is for the kids in special education in San Francisco Unified. There are hundreds of competitors, each one having more fun than then next.

I really love the Parade in the beginning. All the kids line up by school and parade in front of the "crowd." Of course there isn't much crowd with the kids and the teachers all in the parade, but the few parents and supporters in the crowd, along with some kids attending on field trips, cheer wildly.

game face

 The Mission High kids were especially fearsome this year, starting with Maggie's Game Face.

It's less scary when she's laughing

Maggie's class

The events are generally not designed for the kids in chairs, but they adapt things to make them work. Maggie and her peers cannot push their wheelchairs on their own, so each had a teacher or paraprofessional pushing them. They take it seriously too. Check out Maggie's teacher Mr. G. and Mr. David gearing up to push Amber and Victor. (Maggie is hanging out behind them with Ms. Laura)

The races are short and hilarious.  Here's a 10 second video to give you an idea.

At one moment one of the kids looked like she was going over in her wheelchair. She only teetered and was righted immediately. The students and all the staff were laughing uproariously while I grabbed my heart. I looked up at the one other mom there and she had a hold of her heart too. We laughed when we saw each other. It was the international worried mom's sign.

I have said it before but it needs repeating. If you have the opportunity to attend a Special Olympic event, do it. It will help your heart and you will find yourself smiling over and over again. . You can see Ms. Maggie and her friend Bob definitely enjoy it.

______________________________________________________________

This post is written in memory of Mikaela Lynch, a nine year old special ed student from San Francisco who was found in a creek today after wandering away from her family home on Mother's Day. I didn't know Mikaela, but it is very likely she is in one of those crowd shots at these Special Olympics last Friday. My heartfelt condolences go out to her parents, family, friends and teachers.

Kiss your children, special or otherwise. Tomorrow is never promised.

Special Olympics

This may get posted twice.  I wrote it from my phone but it didn't post and it's floating out there in the blogosphere somewhere. I'm trying again.

Today is Special Olympics and Maggie has her game face ON

Not too many athletes put on eye black for track and field events, but Maggie is not like too many athletes anyway.

More to follow!

Special Olympics

Maggie had Special Olympics on Friday. It was great. Perfect weather and 700 kids ready for action.This was done through the San Francisco Unified District in partnership with Special Olympics, which is the only way Maggie has even been able to participate.

If you have the chance to spend some time at a Special Olympics event, I highly recommend you do so. It will make you happy. The smiles are everywhere and I can promise you that you have never seen a more enthusiastic opening ceremonies parade. There is unabashed  pride in the Star Spangled Banner and Pledge of Allegiance and especially in reciting the Special Olympics pledge. I don't get teary eyed in Maggie's World very often, but this is so incredibly sweet it's difficult not to. Unless you are made of stone, you will be moved, awestruck, delighted and humbled all at the very same moment.

It was track and field day today and Maggie participated in two races, beating out her classmate and friend Robert by a nose in each race. Here they are laughing in the stands just before their event.


There were so many kids of all school ages ready to compete and the event seemed far more organized than in past years.  None of it would have worked  without the incredible teachers who do so much behind the scenes. There are also volunteers from various group; lots of kids from the typical school population, but also corporate sponsors. There were at least 10 people there from Torani, the syrup you mix in various drinks. I love that stuff anyway, but now I will buy it with pride. They were cheering on Maggie and all the kids in all of the events. They were also having just as much fun as the kids. Win. Win.

The whole experience was just made even better by the beautiful day we had here. The weather could not have been better. Blue sky, big sun, light breeze. Perfect. I dropped Maggie and the nurse off and had to go find a place to park, which turned out to be easy enough. When I walked into the stadium I had to stop for a minute and take in the scene.  There were a lot of people there. Student athletes, volunteers, teachers, support staff, event staff, family members and more. Some of the schools had classes of typically developing kids there to cheer on their schoolmates to victory. They had signs to root for thier particular school. It was a wonderful thing to see and to be a part of.

As I entered, I was struck by how many people were there just to make sure these kids had a positive experience. And I'll bet every one of them did. I can tell you one mom certainly did. 

Everyone really IS a winner at special Olympics.  

Maggie with her cheering sections, Dad, Miss Laura, Nurse Janice and Miss Eva.

Put the LIme in the coconut, then you feel lbetter

Maggie missed special Olympics. 

 It's Friday 13th. And it started early.  

The nurse woke me at 12:45 because Maggie's sats(oxygen saturation levels)  were dropping and she was needing more and more oxygen. We got her stabilized and she fell asleep. I decided to wait on the ER because she needed the rest. She was stable and we were dong everything they would do at the hospital. Things are just easier in the cool light of morning. I came back down around 5:45 and she was still needing a ton of oxygen. 

I called the pulmonologist. He does't know Maggie - never seen her. I talked to him the other day after the xray which he called "equivocal". He gave me some attitude immediately and put the hair on the back of my neck at attention. Not a good idea. he said, "Recall I suggested we see her yesterday." I responded with "yes, that's Right, doctor and she wasn't that sick then.  TODAY she is sicker and I'm wondering if I should bring her to the ER."  pause, "Well I certainly would." A little jab, but I ignored it.   

Ok. We go to the ER, she has another chest xray and a ton of lab work. She has a very high heart rate (like 140) and  low sats (like 83) and needs a ton of O2. The also give her a litre of fluids because she's dehydrated. We are doing great in the ER and then this same doc from the phone call  comes down with a sort of "I don't know why you are here" attitude. 

 Really, dude? You guilt me for not coming, and then question why I've come. Even the ER doc and nurse called him on that. I wanted to say "Pick a side and stay there - don't just be opposite of me. It's not a fun place to be." - but I didn't.

 He figured it out soon enough. 

I got a little snippy with him and insisted we have a game plan. He threatened admission. I said "do you think she needs that" He said No, I said  "then why are you suggesting it? don't think that's what I want. I just want to know when I should be worried enough to come back."  He said come back if she needs increased oxygen and has a high heart rate. I looked at Steve and at the ER doc incredulously and said, "you mean like NOW?" He said I guess I mean higher than this. What's the highest O2 need she's ever had?  I said "this is it." He said. ok, if it gets any higher. 

 He wasn't making any sense, but I discerned it isn't an obvious  bacterial issue and the drugs she is on should be ok. Or it's viral and they won't help and neither will any other drug.  I can handle this at home, but I don't want to be stupid or cavalier about when we should go.  

When he left the room I looked at Steve and shook my head. I said "that was unnecessarily difficult. Steve just smiled wanly and said, "he was teetering on the brink." I said "Brink of what" Steve just paused and said "we both know." I smiled because I did know. I was snippy, but I didn't take his head off like I can and will if I have to. But he WAS on the brink of that. I'm getting better in my old age. 

So we are home and hoping two things. 1) this starts to go in a positive direction or 2) that's he's not on call this weekend. I need someone I can work with and he aint' it.  The ER doc and nurse kept telling me NOT TO HESITATE TO RETURN.

We left there with a dx of "presumptive viral pneumonia"  and told "to get plenty of rest and fluids."  After all tht it sounded like a commercial for Bayer aspirin. 

Apparently Maggie's only olympic event was rapid breathing. She medaled. 

Everyone's a winner

What's Brewing?

Maggie's school year will be over by Memorial Day. That means we are down to the last couple of weeks when all the fun stuff happens. Maggie has a huge week or so scheduled. Special Olympics is on Friday. The special ed picnic is on Monday and the Prom is NEXT Friday.

And today she is getting sick.

Come ON. Don't make her miss out on this stuff. It is just not fair.

She's needed supplemental oxygen since yesterday and now she's sleepy and coughing up strange colors. I've called the doctor, but I suspect we will have to wait for this to fully rear its ugly head to deal with it. She could be brewing up another pneumonia - that seems to be her "go to" illness. And, if I'm right that will knock her out for a week or so.

I hope I'm wrong, but my antennae are up

.

Sepcial Olympics report and pitures

Special Olympics was the greatest! All the kids have such a great time and everyone works very hard to insure that.It is a very impressive effort by alot of people. cge It's like old home week. Maggie gets to see friends who have gone to other schools, old teachers, classroom aides and nurses too.

Here are a few pictures and I will post video at some future point,but for right now you can see all the still pictures at Maggie's photo share site http://sfmaggiespecialolympics.shutterfly.com/

Maggie only competed in one event - a wheelchair race/dash with folks pushing. She was lucky enough to draw a school mate who's on the track team and won her event!  I don't even know his name, but he impressed me by introducing himself to Maggie and telling her he intended to make sure she won. I loved that!

I will say Maggie was very well pleased with herself and she was very happy that my mother "Grandma Carmel" showed up to cheer her on. I had her teacher snap a quick shot of the three of us.

Maggie also got to see Teacher Joe from last year. He delighted her by saying "Having fun is ok, but WINNING is what's important" (Of course they've been hearing the opposite for weeks.) I thought she was going to blow a gasket when he said that!

Here's Maggie basking in her victory and eating lunch at the same time.

Check out the rest of the photos at http://sfmaggiespecialolympics.shutterfly.com/

Special Olympics on Friday!!!

If any of you are around Kezar Stadium in San Francisco, tomorrow is Special Olympics!! Come on out and cheer maggie and her teammates onto victory.

I made tie-dye shirts for about 20 Mission folks yesterday. We should be easy to spot. I don't have a shirt, but you can find me by my tie-dyed hands

I will post Special Olympic photos tomorrow. Maggie is in the wheelchair race and some sort of tossing event. She is tentatively set for the power chair race too, but that depends on whether or not the power chair can fit on the bus. There are practical considerations at play always.                                                             

Eunice

Eunice Kennedy Shriver died last night. She was 88 and had a very full life. There was a lot of tragedy and loss, certainly, but there was a lot of wonder as well. Eunice Kennedy Shriver is credited with creating the Special Olympics. In fact, I read this morning that she held the first “Olympics” in 1962 in her own backyard. Today there are over 3 million athletes participating in Special Olympics. Maggie is one of them.

Originally, the Special Olympics were only for the mentally disabled. The poster child often had Down’s syndrome. Over the years, it has expanded into all sorts of disabilities including physical disabilities like those that Maggie has. Where else would Maggie ever get the chance to compete in a power wheelchair race and get cheered wildly for taking over 10 minutes to go about 50 feet. The smile on her face was as big as I have ever seen.

Of course, Special Olympics are not without its critics. Many object because it is not inclusive – it separates the disabled form the community. That is true, it does. However, someone needs a reality check. These athletes would be excluded anyway because could not compete with typical kids. They would be last, they would not be picked, and they would be left out…again. Those who object can simply stay away, no one is forcing them to participate or compete. It is all about having fun. It is all about creating fun for kids who do not have enough fun in their lives. If you want to criticize that, go right ahead. I will be over here avoiding your bad karma.

Can you imagine what it took to get Special Olympics off the ground? It took Kennedy determination and dedication and all the financial resources that come with that. In addition, though, Eunice Kennedy Shriver had to change attitudes. She had to convince her own family to share the biggest secret of their lives. She had to convince them to tell the world about their sister Rosemary and her own mental disabilities. Rosemary Kennedy and other disabled individuals born before 1950 were hidden. They lived in institutions, they were not part of society, they were not part of their families, they were not part of our world.

Attitudes have changed in the past generation or so, due in large part to the Special Olympics showing happy kids. Everyone can relate to happy kids, even if they happened to be disabled. Of course, there is a long way to go. I can only hope there is another person like Eunice Kennedy Shriver to lead us into the light and show us all the wonder and life in all children, regardless of abilities.

Olympic Report

The Special Olympics were great. It was a perfect day -- clear but not too hot. Maggie had her game face on and was ready for action.

The stadium was full of hundreds of people, mostly school kids competing in one event or another. There is a high ratio of adults to kids in special ed, so there were plenty of teachers, therapists, aides, parents, nurses and other folks around as well. It always amazes me to see the level of dedication in the people who work with kids with special needs.

Maggie’s name was not on the slalom list and she did not get to compete in that event. That was a bummer because her friend Jordan was going to push her. Both girls were disappointed, but honestly, I was a little bit relieved. It is very easy to tip Maggie’s chair over and, in the excitement of the race, that was a distinct possibility.
The power chair race was another story. Maggie competed in this event last year when it took her at least 5 minutes to go the 20 yards. This year she did it in about two minutes. All the competitors did it in about 15 seconds, so Maggie was the last one out there, but that made everyone yell for her even more. Here she is approaching the finish line.

Every time I go to Special Olympics, something really gets to me. Yesterday was no exception. There was a manual chair race with kids who could propel themselves. This is incredibly difficult for these kids. They are not in chairs because an accident affected their ability to walk. The most common reason is cerebral palsy or something similar that affects the entire body, not just the legs. One young guy was out there moving himself forward very slowly and deliberately. I could see the concentration and pride. It made me a little teary, but I was shouting as loud as everyone else was as he neared the finish line.

I have to admit, the day was hard for me. Maggie’s challenges are just part of the fabric of our day, but seeing her out there with her true peers somehow brought the whole weight of this down on me. It was as though I was looking at my life through a different set of eyes.I am so proud of Maggie. She has accomplished far more than I ever anticipated she would given her physical and medical limitations. But you know what? It is a lot to deal with and occasionally I realize that.

Busy Friday

Just a quick post today. Lots of big happenings in Maggie's world.

Two different cousins graduate this weekend. Cousin Pete is finishing the University of Arizona and cousin Colleen is receiving her masters at the University of Vermont. Way to go guys!

Today is the Special Olympics track and field meet. This is the big meet that takes place at Kezar stadium. Last year it was so much fun and I expect nothing less this year. Maggie is in the power wheelchair race and the slalom event in the manual chair. Her girlfriends will push her in that one. If you're in the area pop into Kezar this morning.



The other news is that Maggie will have an extra fan in the stands today. Big Brother Tim arrived home yesterday after a year away at school. Whoo HOO! Maggie is a happy girl. She and Tim have always had a special bond. He will yell louder than anyone.



I know there are differing opinions on the Special Olympics. It still keeps kids separate. But my attitude is better separate and having fun than included and sitting on the sidelines.



Whatever your point of view, I have a suggestion. If you ever get a chance to go the Special Olympics, do it. Try to catch the opening ceremonies if nothing else. It makes your heart soar to see all those smiles.
Maggie crossing the finish line last year

Special Olympics

Maggie at Special Olympics May 2008

I was disappointed to hear President Obama joke about his low bowling score with a Special Olympics reference. Very disappointed. Here is a president seemingly so tuned in to groups of everyday American often forgotten or overlooked. That little slip, and it was really nothing more than that, reveals that his fine-tuning does not include the disabled.

B U M M E R.

Disabled individuals and their families are often isolated because of their situation and excluded from everyday activities. This is not out of unkindness or malice; instead, it is the reality of the disability not working with the activity. The Special Olympics provides recreation, competition, inclusion, fun, camaraderie and entertainment for thousands and thousands of disabled individuals all over the world. Without Special Olympics, these individuals would continue to be excluded. To quote their own website

Dignity, acceptance, and a chance to reach one’s potential – these are human rights worth promoting for everyone. Since 1968, Special Olympics has been bringing one message to the world: people with intellectual disabilities can and will succeed if given the opportunity. (http://www.specialolympics.org/What_We_Do.aspx)

Can the children compete with athletes who are not disabled? Generally, no. Are there exceptions to that? Of course.

Power wheelchair race

But here is a newsflash: that is not the point. The point is to provide healthy competition and fun in an environment that works in the disabled world, not in the typical world. By doing this the Special Olympics raises awareness and opens doors for acceptance. They are, in their own words, “Creating a World of Acceptance.” The success of Special Olympics is legendary.

Those making fun or making jokes about the Special Olympics have not opened their heart and minds to the realities of the world of the disabled, the human dignity involved or the wonders of the Special Olympics. Now, it appears the President is among them. Bummer again.

President Obama has already apologized for his comment. I accept that apology on behalf of my daughter and myself. I hope that this slip will create a dialog that will remind everyone of the human beings involved in Special Olympics. Those human beings, both the athletes and the staff, are working as hard as they can to make a difference in the world in their own ways. That should be applauded, not ridiculed.

Take a moment today to consider those involved in Special Olympics. Contribute something if you can. It doesn’t have to be money. It can be time and, probably most important of all, it can be respect.

Stop making fun of it and you just might learn something.

Happy Birthday Maggie

Today is Maggie actual birthday. She was born 15 years ago, on March 3, 1994. That was a hard day in my life. I've written the whole story, but it's too much to think about now.

Yesterday was frustrating. Maggie stayed home from school because she is still ill. It was special olympics day, so I took her there myself. I figured she could do that much and then come home. She was dressed and ready to go in her new basketball socks. We arrived at the gym and there was no way to get close in a car. It's very pretty, set way back in a grove of trees. It looked very far away in the downpour. The kids had to walk through the rain about 50 yards to the gym. The path was full of puddles; I could see some of the kids feet were completely submerged. That was daunting.Pushing a wheelchair through standing water is very difficult.

It was also on a fairly busy narrow street and there was no where to unload the wheelchair. I called the nurse on the cell because the class was already inside. I explained my dilemma. She said they had a hard time getting the other kids in because the path was also very steep. I asked where the bus unloaded and she said they just blocked traffic for about ten minutes. It's one thing for a school bus to do that and quite another for a personal vehicle. Besides, I couldn't just leave Maggie out there while I parked the car. The closest spot was about three blocks away.

The nurse offered to come and help me, but I said, I think we have to skip this. It was POURING rain, Maggie was sick, her eye was still swollen shut, and the access was just ridiculous. Somebody was a little unclear on the concept. Special olympics should not have access issues.(No one's fault it was raining, but it's the first week of March and that's entirely likely).

Maggie was NOT happy with me, but sometimes mean moms have to make the tough calls.

I needed some Irish tea so we went to buy that. We parked inside and she never got wet. The store was a bit difficult to maneuver in the wheelchair, but we managed. She was wiped out when we got home.

In fact, she's home today as well. We're going to go say hello at school if this downpour stops. She's sick, but she has stretches where she's doing well. And it's her birthday, so we can't just hang out. I suggested a bowl of ice cream with a candle for tonight, since we had a big cake on Sunday. Remember, Maggie doesn't eat cake or ice cream. Actually I don't really eat cake either. But Steve does. And he thought that was a dumb idea. So we'll make another cake today. That will be fun for Maggie anyway.

My girl is fifteen. Amazing. Though remembering the day she was born is difficult, every day since has been a miracle. I never in a million years thought she'd be here on her 15th birthday. She's here and thriving. (Present illness notwthstanding).