I'll think about that tomorrow.

It is six months since we lost Maggie. It sees like yesterday and it seems like forever. We have been floating along trying to keep our heads above water. This takes a lot of effort and many other things in the business of life have necessarily taken a back seat. There are some major decisions to be made, and I for one am purposefully not making them yet. Yes, our way of handling these major decisions has been to deliberately delay them.

Right after Maggie passed away, we decided to take a trip. We really couldn't travel with Maggie and taking even a couple of days required extraordinary effort to get all Maggie's care and supplies in place. An extended trip was out of the question.  Now it isn't and we are going to Ireland. 

Obviously the trip is exciting and looking forward to it and planning it has been a great distraction. We've had the airline tickets for months and with the help of our friend Colm, we have a great itinerary planned. The trip has been more than that, though. It has been a distant point in the future after which we will make decisions.  

The mantra in this house has been, "We'll decide when we return from Ireland."  This is our own version of Scarlet O'Hara saying "I won't think about that today, I'll think about that tomorrow."

Unlike Scarlet and Rhett, however, Steve and I live in the real world and decisions can't be put off forever. 

The trip to Ireland looms and my excitement is tempered somewhat by the realization that Going on the trip means we are closer to returning from the trip and making decisions. I finally said to Steve, we need to realize that the universe isn't just going to open up and provide answers for us the moment we get back in the USA. Perhaps that's just another delay tactic. 

One such decision is what to do with myself. I worked 24/7 taking care of or managing Maggie's care for nearly 20 years. Not having that constant responsibility takes a lot of getting used to.  I'm not used to it yet, and probably never will be, but I have to fill up my days in a way that make sense to me and maybe does a little good in the world; and for the first time in a long time, I want to get paid to do it. I need a job that will interest me, and allow me to use my talents and the knowledge I gained being part of Maggie's World. I think about it, I have some ideas. I talk to people about it, but I am waiting to move forward That is a huge decision at any time, but particularly after/during such an emotionally wrenching time. I'll figure it out when we return from Ireland. 

There are other major decisions as well. I sold the van and haven't replaced it yet. I don't drive that much and have been borrowing my father in laws car when I need one. Getting a car and the type will depend on what I decide to do. I've considered just going without and using Uber around town, but I don't think I'm quite cool enough for that; and I don't want to be the one someone always has to come and pick up. There are days Steve doesn't need his car, but we never know when. We really need 1.5 cars, not 2; but it's hard to find the .5 vehicles these days. Maybe they sell them in Ireland. 

And, of course, there's the matter of this house being dogless. Should we get another dog? What kind? An Irish wolfhound?  All of these decisions are interrelated in some ways. Should we get a dog if I'm going to be working outside of the house full time? Will my working require a car? should we get a car that works with a dog? etc. Will the dog fit in a .5 vehicle?

I'm sure all of these things will fall into place in their own way; but we both want to stop floating and start grabbing ahold of life again.  There is still a little time left to enjoy the delay and we have to not worry about these things so we can enjoy the trip.

So, channelling Miss Scarlett, I won't think about it today, I'll think about it tomorrow. 

Catching up and checking out.

Halloooo out there.

Sorry for the delay. All is well, it's just been CRAAAAZY busy around here.

Over the weekend Maggie's private designer, Anne Marie came with the final fitting for the prom dress. It is AMAZING, and it looks incredible on Maggie, but I'm going to make you wait until next week because it is a school project and Anne Marie wants to turn it in and let people see it in person before they see it on the internet. That's fair. Suffice it to say the Miss Maggie is over the moon excited about it. (and I may have accidentally posted a pic on a certain social media site as well...)

In other news, I started a job on Monday. Well, to be precise, I increased and existing job and have a new title. I work as a Parent Liaison at UCSF Benioff Children's hospital three days a week. I've been working in the Family Resource Room on Fridays for the past several months but the powers that be decided to increase my time and sort of formalize what I have already been doing. I have really spent an inordinate amount of time in the hospital and have a pretty good idea how things work. Now I can share that experience and knowledge with other parent and know that it was not for naught and it will be put to good use.

But the biggest news is this. I am leaving this morning for Chicago. Steve and I are going to visit Tim and watch the Giants play the Cubs at Wrigley Field on Friday. At least we hope we will. This is the forecast for the weekend in Chicago.  Steve left this morning so it includes Wednesday. FYI I talked to Steve and so far this is spot on.

Wednesday

HIGH/LOW

42°/37°

Several rainy spells, possibly heavy and with the potential for thunder and even some hail, sweep the area in several clusters Wednesday.

The periods of rain are likely to be separated by precipitation-free cloudy spells. Wider coverage, more frequent downpours develop Wednesday with thunder and possible hail Wednesday night. Blustery, chilly, damp and raw through Wednesday night. Unseasonably chilly daytime highs 15-degrees below normal. Northeast winds 12 to 24 mph Wednesday increasing 13 to 28 mph with some 30+ mph gusts Wednesday night. Widespread rainfall of 1 to 3" is possible by daybreak Thursday morning.

 

Thursday

HIGH/LOW

48°/33°

Another cool damp day for most sections

Breezy east winds hold area temperatures in the middle to upper 40s (50s to lower 60s far south) during the day. Occasional showers and thunderstorms with some heavy downpours.

 

Friday

HIGH/LOW

38°/30°

Mostly cloudy, blustery and cold with some rain or wet snow.

Quite chilly as temps remain in the 30s most of the day. Partly cloudy and cold at night. North to northeast winds 15 to 30 mph.

 

Saturday

HIGH/LOW

43°/35°

Partly sunny start to the day, then clouds build with a chance of brief showers.

Continued very cool with highs holding in the lower and middle 40s. An increase in high and mid-level clouds at night. Northwest winds diminish and become light variable overnight.

 

Sunday

HIGH/LOW

55°/43°

Thickening and lowering clouds with an increasing likelihood of showers and thunderstorms in the afternoon..

Not as cold as afternoon highs surge to the middle 50s. More showers and thunderstorms possible at night. Southerly winds 10-18 mph.

 

 I might accidentally get on a plane headed to Hawaii. No, what's a little weather for a California girl who owns a ton of sweaters? I am looking forward to seeing my son who left for Chicago at the beginning of the year and also catching up with friends who live there. I'm sure we can find plenty of ways to entertain ourselves if the Giants are rained - or rather snowed - out. There seems to be plenty to do.

Maggie is staying here with her nurses and my wonderful sister Joni and her husband are staying in the house while we are gone. Joni can't do any of the things Maggie needs medically and she wondered what her role would be. She asked "am I just supposed to LOVE Maggie?"

I said exactly.

See you all next week and pictures of the amazing prom dress will be unveiled.

Noise from the past

Hello out there. I've been buried under work and spring break and Easter and everything, but I have now come up for air. Hope all is well in your world.

Last week an old friend came over for dinner with his family. Geordie and I practiced law together 25 years ago. He moved back to Portland and other than one brief encounter about 3 years ago, I haven't seen him in probably 18 years. His son and Maggie are the same age and both were babies the last time we spent any time together. It was great to see him and his family and all those years melted away as we reminisced and bored his kids and Maggie with old stories.

Geordie was a few years behind me and I was one rung up on the food chain. For a short while,  I was kinda sorta the associate to whom he reported. He and Craig, another lawyer, were hilarious and those were some fun years. They did a video mocking my office full of books and my encouraging style of editing their work. I never realized until I saw that video that I would constantly tell them what a great piece they had written while completely changing it. The video showed only a head behind huge stack of books effusively praising the work and then handing over a legal brief with red marks and inserts completely covering the page. Made me laugh then, and still does today.

Because I was older and wiser I was the first of that group to have babies. (Babies were a sensitive subject for female attorneys when Eddie was born in 1988 and probably still is today.  That subject is for another day, however.) Geordie and Craig took it upon themselves to shower Eddie and Tim with gifts - always the noisiest gifts possible.

Before they arrived for dinner, Geordie's wife Lori was texting me about the plans to get together. She advised that Geordie was bringing a Bow and Arrow set for Tim and a drum set for Eddie. That made me remember something and I knew I had a picture. I went upstairs and stated digging through old pictures* until I found what I was looking for. Eddie holding the JACKHAMMER those guys gave him when he was about three.

You cannot imagine how loud that thing was. But my boys loved it and played with it all the time. ALL. THE. TIME. 

It was hilarious to hear Geordie and Lori tell their kids about visiting here with our two wild boys jumping on furniture and racing around while Steve and I were calm cool and collected. (Funny, I don't remember either the wildness or ever being calm.) They said we made it look easy so they figured having kids wasn't that big of a deal.

(Picture me with my head thrown back laughing wickedly.)

It was amazing to think back to those times before Maggie was born. Our life was just as crazy then as it is now, but in a more conventional way.  Maggie was not nearly as entertained as we were, though, because even if she wasn't born, she cannot imagine a time when she was not the center of the world.

*Lest you think otherwise, I did give Eddie fair warning that I was going to post this picture and he put it on facebook first. 

Ahhhh, Monday

I know I'm not normal. I absolutely love Monday morning. Especially after a wild weekend. The busiest weekend in recent memory has ended. It was a good one, but wow, I am certainly tired.

Saturday night Steven and I hosted the holiday party for the lawyers in Steve's office. there were about 35 people invited for a catered dinner. Originally we were going to do it here and move Maggie and all her equipment and supplies upstairs for the evening, move the furniture down to the basement, put a tent over the deck and squeeze everyone in. My mom offered her big party house instead. Originally I said no but upon reflection (and my sister saying ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND?) I jumped at it.

There was still lots of rearranging to do, but Maggie was not disrupted. Parking is an Olympic sport in this neighborhood but plentiful at my mom's house, which is so much easier. Also, since it was absolutely pouring rain all weekend, and Maggie's bathroom sprung a leak, I am especially glad we didn't do it here. It all went great, though I still have to get Tim back over there to put everything back where it goes.

My mom was so generous to do that even though all she really got out of it were a few decorations. Her beautiful house looked more beautiful than ever. Walking up the front porch folks were welcomed by several poinsettias and a beautiful wreath and then the entry hall had even bigger poinsettias and small trees (which were then given as gifts when folks left)

The party went perfectly and everyone had a great time. 

Maggie was not that pleased with the whole arrangement, though, as she was stuck at home with the nurse. She and Steve were gong to go out on Saturday morning, but they did home repairs instead. Steve decided to replace the hot water dispenser Saturday morning  had Maggie help him. I freaked out a little when he handed her his power drill, but she thought that was hilarious. And if you need to ask, the answer is NO, he did not let her actually use it. But she did get to press the button while he was holding it and that cracked her up.

Unfortunately for Maggie the installation took all day and she never got to go out, and then Sunday morning was the craziest part of the stormy weekend, so she spent the weekend indoors. The rain cleared around noon, but Steve and I had tickets to the matinee of The Book of Mormon so Maggie was stuck inside again. That play is absolutely hilarious. If you are easily offended I would stay away, but there are some raucous laughs in that play.

Nothing is on the calendar for this weekend, so we will take Maggie out of the town to make up for her weekend of indoor solitude. I think we might have to do our trip to see the Christmas windows downtown.

Professional parent

Maggie is off school today. It is a furlough day. A day that the state took away from the education of California youth and a day that teachers and other district employees go without pay because of the budget problems. I will just let that stew out there for everyone. If you don't find it ridiculous and upsetting please  wait and think about it again until you do.

Generally, a day off is just another excuse to hang out together and go on one of our many outings. Not today, though. I have to go to work. Because I am self employed and can control my schedule,  I have always been able to work when Maggie was at school. I recently agreed to work somewhere else on Friday mornings. After nearly 18 years of making my schedule work for Maggie, I have to make sure I have child care so I can go to work. I feel like it's 1991 all over again!

My job is only on Friday mornings.  I work about three hours a week at UCSF Benihoff children's Hospital. After volunteering there for years, they finally decided to make me a contractor. I work in the Family Resource Room, which is a place where parents of inpatient children can go to use computers, make long distance calls if needed, grab a cup of coffee and a magazine or just take a break from being at their child's beside 24 hours a day. This place saved me when Maggie was in the hospital for long stretches. Now there's wireless access, for those who have portable computer devices, but five years ago and more the only way to get online was in that room.  I am one of two parents doing this and I can tell you it is a big deal.  The hospital hired us BECAUSE we are parents, which demonstrates an understanding of the unique role veteran hospital parents can play in supporting families in the hospital.

I guess you can say I'm a professional parent. Becoming a lawyer only took three years after college. The preparation for this job was much longer and more arduous.

I just started this job. In fact the unbelievable amount of required paperwork was finally completed yesterday. Obviously anyone working in a medical center has to show they are not carrying any diseases. In the past two weeks I've had a flu shot, a tetanus/diphtheria shot and a TB test. In addition I had to show immunity for or get a shot to prevent MMR (measles, mumps and rubella) and varicella (chicken pox.)  Because of my advanced age  I actually HAD all four of those diseases when I was a kid. [Yes, I know there are vaccines now,  I hear they have also invented fire.] I did not want to have live viruses injected into me and opted for the blood tests to prove I had the necessary immunities. Sadly I forgot to tell the doctor to order the varicella and had to go back for a second blood draw. I asked if I could just bring a note from my kindergarten teacher that I did in fact have the chicken pox in 1961, but they wanted it done their way. Very well. I feel like a pin cushion, but mission finally accomplished. I can now tell you that I am immune to nearly every disease known to man.

I am not immune from child care issues, though. Generally the nurse come after school and works with Maggie into the evening. I asked Josephine to come early today so I can go to the hospital and do my gig.  I promised Maggie we would go to the mall at dinner time. This way, even though she's stuck in the house all day, she has something to look forward to. She is excited about that because there will actually be people her age at the mall on Friday evening, not just the old ladies like me that we see when we go on weekend mornings.

Maggie knows that Josephine is coming and that makes her happy. She also knows that we are going out after Josephine goes home and that makes her happy. She's ready for this great day to begin. For the first time in her life Maggie just made the following sentence:

"Mom, go to work Mom"

I have to tell you that made me quite happy. So I'm off.

Checking in to end the week

Quiet week for blogposts. I am trying to take advantage of this time that Maggie is in school to get a lot of things done. School is out next Thursday and then it will the Maggie and Mom show for four weeks until school starts again. It will be very difficult to get anything done then so I'm donig my best now.

The time approaches for our great floor sanding and refinishing extravaganza and I have been getting rid of things left and right in anticipation of our need to completely empty the first floor of the house. My office is completely out of the dining room and in a dedicated room upstairs. There is a bed in my office in case everyone is home at once, but it has officially been changed from a bedroom to an office.

This change was necessary because I am trying to do a little more (paid)  legal work and want to be up and running by the time Maggie goes back to school in Mid august.. I cannot run a practice from the dining room with Maggie and the nurse right there. I need some space.  It's nice because the room is really a sun room and it is full of light. Good thing it's so bright. I have yet to decorate. In fact the only thing on the wall is the card my husband gave me for our anniversary a few years ago. I love this picture. It's hanging just above my computer and it makes me laugh every time I look at it.

Kind of explains a lot, doesn't it.

I think Miss Maggie is ready for summer school to be over. She has been falling asleep every day. She still loves going to school, but I don't think there is enough to entertain her and she's bored. Maybe it was just too many changes with a new site and a new teacher. She adores "Mr. Kyle" but she can't seem to stay awake. And she's not sick.

I have to start planning Mom Camp II for the next four weeks. The week we spend at Uncle Pat's house will be a something very different, but it will be hard on all of us. Caring for Maggie anywhere else will be tricky but it's a great option because he has a bedroom on the ground floor and we can get Maggie in and out easily. Also it's very near the zoo, so Maggie and I can get acquainted with the apes and giraffes. She also has Girls Rock camp the first week of August, but I really have to go with her to that. I can send her nurse, but I will probably do it myself to make sure she really gets int here and takes part in everything. We will take in the Picasso exhibit at the DeYoung Museum and I'm certain have a few trips to the mall, Maggies' favorite outing in the world.

Hope everyone has a great weekend. No holidays or fireworks this weekend. But we will make our own fun.

Christmess

Christmas Shopping !

It's 7AM Sunday morning and the house is completely torn apart. We got the tree yesterday and it's up, but all the decorations are spread out in the living room. The dining room table is also covered with unfinished work projects, Christmas cards, wrapping paper etc. For the past 30 minutes I have been sifting through determining what can go back down to the basement, what can be recycled, what goes upstairs etc. It doesn't look a bit different, so I'm walking away for a few minutes.

 Maggie continues to display some troubling symptoms, but is happy and on the top of her game. The new medicine Maggie is on is so thick it is wreaking havoc with her g-tube.Someone told me coca-cola was a sure fix for a clogged tube, but even that didn't work.  I had to change it again last night, that's three times this week. That, however, is the only dark spot in this excellent week.

As you know Eddie graduated last weekend. On Friday he was offered a full time job doing exactly what he wants to do, marketing for a bike company, and specifically focusing on mountain bikes.  I could not be more excited for him. The next few weeks will be a whirlwind because the job starts January 1 in Orange County. He has to find a place to live and get himself moved down there between now and then. This news has had an amazing effect on all of us. and it's making me feel the joy of the season.

Friday evening I went to a reunion of a law firm I worked at from 1983 - 1991. I left when Tim was just a year old. There were about 50 people there when I left and I knew 3/4 of them even though I hadn't worked there in 20 years. It was great to see faces of people I hadn't seen and always great to reconnect with those I do see. My life is do completely different now than it was then, but those were certainly some great years.  I could only stay a short time because we were headed to another office Christmas party. Whew.

              Last night we did something completely different. We went on a living history tour of the ships on the Hyde Street Pier. The players were dressed in costume from and acting as though it was 1901. It is hard to see in the picture, but we are being escorted onto the ship "Balcutha" by our night watchman.  We me some of the sailors in the "fo'c'sle" and then met the Captain and his wife in their quarters and learned how they celebrated Christmas on these ships in 1901. It was very cool and the lights of the City were lovely. We had dinner on Fisherman's Wharf afterward and then came home to unclog the tube. No rest for the wicked.

Now I'm done with my Christmas social outings. I am staying home, finishing the shopping, writing the cards and mucking out the house.  

Back to the Grind

It's a beautiful Monday here in San Francisco and a great day for a milestone birthday for my (much) older brother. Happy Birthday, Ed.

We had a fun weekend here. Both boys were home for the weekend. Tim was here all week for Spring Break, but Eddie just came home for the weekend. It was good to have everyone together. That happens less and less often. As you can see, Maggie is very happy when her boys are here 

They went back to school yesterday and it was back to the grind for Maggie. I believe 16 is the legal age to put a kid to work, right? Disability is no excuse. Check out this short video. It's just a peek into a few minutes of her day.  Maggie at Work

Splashdown!

have returned to earth after yesterday’s trip into orbit. The reimbursement check was ready this morning and I went straight to the bank and waited for the teller I know best and she agreed the funds would be available tomorrow so I can pay the nurses. Often times, because the reimbursement amount is significant, the bank holds the check for several days. I have been assured that sufficient funds will clear so that I can make payroll tomorrow. I am relieved, but still fuming. I do not like to be reminded how close we live to the edge.

Maggie’s health remains in question. She made it “all day” at school today. (Note: The summer school ends at noon.) I did get two calls from the nurse because of different things coming out of various tubes. Individually none of them is particularly bad news; collectively, however, they demonstrate Maggie is likely fighting off a bug. I hope that she can make it the last couple of days at summer school. We then have. about five weeks to get her tuned up and back to fighting form.

During the school break, we are trying to schedule a couple of exams under anesthesia. Actually, it would be two exams, by two different specialists, but one anesthesia. That is better for Maggie, but it is difficult to schedule two very busy pediatric specialists for the same day. It will happen, though. Once they look around her lungs and her gut, we may have a better idea why certain symptoms keep happening as they do. If nothing else, it will give Maggie something to write about for her “What I did on my summer vacation” essay.

I need to finish a project because I’m not sure how I will be able to work once she gets out of school. I have been reviewing and gathering ideas for a couple of weeks . I waanted to work on it all week, but yesterday was lost. I really hope there's no more drama with her services because I can't afford to waste any more time.

I have to power through. Maggie better cooperate and stay healthy for the next 72 hours!

Catching up...

It has been a crazy busy week around here. Despite graduation, Maggie returned to school to finish out the last two days with her classmates. School is her social center, so she was delighted to go.

That gave me the opportunity to gather all the supplies from this classroom and have them ready for summer school. There are two huge bags of diapers, tubes, food, meds and other supplies. I am just leaving those intact in the back of the van to bring to the summer school site. If I move it I will use something and then have to run around to get her set up at the new place.

I also had the opportunity to get some gifts for the teacher and staff in Maggie's classroom.There is the teacher and the nurse and two aides who I felt must have something from me.There are countless others as well, but I focused on the classroom staff. This is the end of three wonderful years. Of course there is no way to convey the thanks I feel, but I was happy to give something.

In unfortunate news, Tim's days as a kilt wearer are numbered. In fact the number is 1. His last day at the Scottish Import store is tomorrow after only two weeks on the job. Seems the boss man finally read the rules on Wednesday as he was preparing Tim's first check. In addition to the charming kilts, rugby equipment, cashmere sweater and tweed caps sold at this store there is very high end single malt scotch. They have open tastings. Open alcohol presents more stringent rules. Turns out you have to be 21 to work there. Tim will be 19 on Wednesday. To say he is bummed is a gross understatement. So it's back to square one on the job search, but at least this time he has some walking around money.

Tonight Maggie is having her first ever sleepover. Her friends Jordan and Sierra are coming over. At first it was just Jordan, but I decided it would be easier if there were two of them. Once Maggie goes to bed she is hooked up to all sorts of machines and the girls will then have each other to hang out with. I'm not really sure how this will go, but they've been hinting around at this for a while and ...what the heck. They have been good friends to Maggie for a couple of years now. Maggie's limitations don't seem to bother them, so we're going to give it a whirl.

Here they are together on Maggies graduation day. They were the designated "Mobility partners" for Maggie and her classmate Grimaldy who was also graduating. The girls were assigned to push the wheelchairs across the stage and back to their place. At the last minute Griimaldy skipped the ceremony, so Sierra accepted his diploma for him.

We will have a fun evening of music and perhaps another showing of "Paul Blart, Mall Cop."

Yes, I said another. It came from Netflix the other day and we laughed all the way through it.

Don't judge me. That movie is funny.

Working for a Living

Ok, ok, here is a new post. I took a couple of days off from this because of other obligations. Once in a great while my work requires me to be elsewhere.

Because of both the complexity and unpredictability of Maggie’s care, I have been working at home since she was born. Occasionally in these 15 years, I have tried to work outside the house, but it never lasts. Responding to constant medical emergencies wears thin for employers. Initially they are very understanding and concerned, but when it happens repeatedly – or I just disappear for a couple of weeks for an extended hospital stay, it simply interferes with running a business. I get that.

While I am very very lucky to be in a position to work from home, and to take the huge financial hit that came with that, I miss working. I am sure I would be complaining mightily if I had to get to the office every day, but from where I sit right now, that would be nice. I am still involved in a few things and I was in court a couple of times in the past few weeks. It felt good.

I miss practicing law. I do not miss the tedium of writing and rewriting briefs or poring through huge stacks of documents; but I miss the intellectual challenges of some of the projects, and I miss the feeling you get when you win a tough case. I also miss the camaraderie of the office and being part of the pulse of downtown.

My advocacy skills help me with Maggie, of course. I know how to present things to agencies and insurers to get things done. It’s not that Maggie gets anything more than she should, but knowing how to work the system has definitely helped her (and me) get the available help. In addition, I have put those skills to use for many other families as well.

I am glad to be able to help, but I do not want to build a business doing this. There are a couple of reasons for that The first is, I can’t bring myself to charge most people for my services but can’t take on their problems without compensation – otherwise I’ve just added their problems to my own. However, even more than the money is the lack of any break from my issues with Maggie. Dealing with the same issues at work that I do at home would drive me ‘round the bend. When you are in the same boat as your client, it is very difficult NOT to get emotionally involved. And that can compromise a lawyer’s ability to advocate appropriately.

I need some balance.

I do a lot of volunteer work. I work with a couple of different non-profits to help kids. It is a perfect way to use my lawyer skills and help people without taking on another family’s sadness or frustration with the system. Right now, I am involved with two organizations.
One is Advokids (www.advokids.org) which assists children in the foster care system. This organization is trying to change a broken system. That means fighting against those who are entrenched in the system. The secret is to keep the focus on the kids the system is supposed to serve instead of the adults who run it. This is a wonderful organization run by all volunteers. There’s a casino night fundraiser scheduled for March 7. Please check out the invitation on the Advokids website. It is a fun night and a great cause.

The other is Friends of CCS (California Children’s services). We are just getting underway; in fact, our incorporation papers are pending, and may be complete by now. CCS is a governmental entity so the services are pretty bare bones, and now with the budget mess, they are being cut drastically. The therapists end up paying for a lot of stuff out of their own pockets but they cannot do it alone. The non-profit “friends of” will raise money to support the work of the physical and occupational therapists that work with Maggie and other kids with physical disabilities.

I do other volunteer things as well. I love the opportunity to speak to classes or groups or be part of a panel addressing the issues families face raising disabled children. I used do that all the time, but those opportunities have sort of dried up. Maybe everyone has heard my story already!

The volunteer work is good for me. It provides some perspective on the world and some insight into how my problems fit in the whole cosmic scheme of things. I still miss being a lawyer, but I do get some balance in my life.